By Kate McDonough
I’ve been feeling great lately! Best I’ve felt in a long time!
That’s awful! Feeling good is no good! Have you tried hyperventilation therapy?!
No! What’s that?
It’s simple! Step one: locate a plastic bag!
Step two: put the gab over your mouth and nose. Create a good seal!
Step three: inhale deeply. Breathe from your chest, not your diaphragm.
Step four: Exhale shallowly. Don’t fully clear your lungs.
Step five: Repeat! As quickly as you can! The tighter your chest feels, the better!
You should start to get dizzy and light-headed. If you feel like you can get a breath in, you’re doing it wrong!
Continue until you pass out!
When you finally wake up, you should feel a deep sense of impending doom!
If you practice this therapy everyday, you’ll be able to completely disrupt your body’s natural breathing rhythm!
There’s no faster way to increase your anxiety!
Try hyperventilation therapy today!